Bollywood review: Kareena, Imran Khan turn ‘Gori Tere Pyaar Mein’ into an insipid mess

You just can’t take movies like ‘Gori Tere Pyaar Mein’ seriously. That’s a given. It’s supposed to be a breezy watch, leaving us with a momentary, happy kick. It’s much like candyfloss – fluffy, sugary, pretty and pink.

Punit Malhotra’s second attempt at a rom-com, however, isn’t any of it.

It’s painful. It’s drab. It's unromantic. And, it’s anything but funny (even unintentionally).

Punit desperately tries to nail the Karan Johar style of rom-coms by packing in the staple ingredients but he’s unable to tie it together.

There are numerous songs and dances but none that are peppy enough. Many costume changes and dressed up backdrops, but none that leave us mesmerized. There are even attempts at being cheeky with Bollywood’s infamous romances by referencing lines/songs/moments, but none of the efforts are impressive enough.

There’s also the “big” conflict but it doesn't appear demanding enough.

Even the fundamental good-looking lovers are uninterested and passionless. They smile, serenade and smirk without any conviction.

Clearly Karan’s brand of romance isn’t “rocket science” but it does require some talent to pull it off. Merely texturing love tales in glossy, frivolous setups is an art that only Karan has mastered, with Shah Rukh Khan by his side.

Why else would the audience lap up audacious rom-coms like ‘Kuch Kuch Hota Hai’ and ‘Kabhi Kushi Kabhi Gham’ but frown at the more recent ‘Ek Main Aur Ek Tu’, ‘Break Ke Bad’ or even ‘I Hate Luv Stories’?

While Karan has technically backed this rom-com as the producer, Punit is unable to flavour it well.

And if his directorial duties wasn’t enough, he even doubles as writer to assist Arshad Syed for the screenplay and dialogue, penning the most tiring and insipid lines ever. Even his lame tricks at borrowing fun lines/instances from Bollywood hit romances isn’t novel or noteworthy.

His love story is set in a terrain unbecoming of Karan’s lavish backdrops - with cowdung and dust playing prominent parts in this romance.

Punit’s crab-consulting Romeo is fair-skinned and polished enough to remove any trace of his Tamilian bloodline, while his Juliet is (also) fair-skinned and spirited to make a social makeover in a rustic village.

Their skin tones, which would’ve otherwise gone unnoticed, is often highlighted, some times in the most inappropriate manner, to drill home the point that South Indians and the downtrodden can only be dark-skinned.

They fall in love, over one wedding song and numerous social revolts. Their parents play the stereotypical mom-dads, each emphasizing Bollywood's North-South divide. The Punjabis are loud, while the Tamilians speak in a weird twang with a white powder smeared on their foreheads. The only liberating change, if you can call it one, is that both are rich.

The lovers splilt because their ideologies do not gel. One’s a hardcore socialist, while the other a self-confessed lazy-bum.

After a few hiccups, which unfold in a rustic village separated from the world by a shaky rope bridge, they unite in “happily ever after”.

Imran Khan sleepwalks through ‘Gori Tere Pyar Mein’ and uses his versatile eyebrows –lifting and  dropping it – to capture Sriram aka SriDevi’s emotional turmoils. And, when his eyebrows aren't doing the work, he leaves it to his Rayban shades to fill in. Through his adventures as the runaway groom, and later a reformed humanitarian, Imran’s dispassionate and unconnected.

Kareena Kapoor Khan breezes through as the feisty Dia Sharma, who picks any, and every, issue to revolt against. Unlike the typical social activists who’ve graced the Bollywood frame in drab, rustic costumes, Kareena’s Dia is always well turned out in colourful outfits and manicured nails. Probably that’s why she believes that merely building a bridge will solve an entire village’s problems.

There’s even newbies Shraddha Kapoor and Esha Gupta who feature in this messy affair. Their mistakes are mostly forgivable while looking at the larger scheme of things.

This one’s a no-brainer, really.

Do not to waste your money on this movie. You are better off donating that amount for a noble cause. At least, it'd be more meaningful than Kareena’s frivolous social efforts.

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