Sporting odds

Ade: Milan is my 'destiny'

It's official: Arsenal's Emmanuel Adebayor has had his head turned. The Togolese striker failed to turn up in the Gunners' Champions League semi-final clashes with Man United, and now he has made it clear his affections lie away from the Emirates. "I often speak to Milan Vice-President Adriano Galliani," crooned Ade when asked about a move to the Rossoneri. "Galliani may not be as sexy as Beyonce, but Milan are." That's amore.

Capture the moment

Steve Davis displayed why he's more famous for his potting ability than his commentary during last week's final of the World Championship between John Higgins and Shaun Murphy at the Crucible: "The humidity is now higher," he whispered into his microphone to convey the tension. "It's gone from one number...to a higher number." Considering the man has earned a fortune calculating century breaks and sneaky snookers, he surely could have come up with something more inspiring in Sheffield. Stick to the day job, Steve.

Ordinary Joe

"Joey [Barton] is actually one of the easiest to manage and handle," coughed up Sporting Chance Clinic's Peter Kay as he reportedly removed a burning cigar butt from his eye and narrowly avoided the onrushing Newcastle player's two-footed lunge. "He is no harder to teach than other players I've worked with. He listens intently. He is an intelligent man." Before we jump on Pete's back, remember former pupils include Tony Adams and Paul Merson.

Toilet trouble

"I know many batsmen are out there praying hard, but sadly I'm the one with the runs," dropped TV beauty Mandira Bedi while watching the Indian Premier League this week, at the same time as thousands of adoring male fans took her posters down from their bedroom walls. Any need for the First Lady of Indian Cricket to be so (unrefreshingly) honest?

 

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